Giving up is not an option

I have had some big feelings this week and I have a confession to make:

I questioned whether the work I do and everything I’ve built my life around is just bullshit. Do people even want connection? Am I even making a difference? Does anything even matter?

Yeah, I went there.

It didn’t last too long, but I did flirt with a little nihilism.

Here’s what got me back on-track:

We’re in a loneliness epidemic. A Gallup survey of global loneliness found that over one in five people worldwide (23%) said they felt loneliness “a lot of the day yesterday.” People are desperate for connection, and purpose, and to not be in so much pain.

I don’t have all the answers to turning the epidemic around, but I know it’s not giving up on our vision as community builders. We don’t have the luxury of faceplanting into fear and despair.

A few days ago I saw a post from Brene Brown—who I consider one of the most important teachers of our time—in which she talked about feeling the same temptation to give up:

“People who subscribe to power-over leadership often weaponize despair. They count on people giving up on themselves, their work, and each other. I get it. I’m looking at people I know with suspicion. I’m questioning the value of my work. I’m wondering if courage, kindness and caring for each other simply don’t matter anymore. I’m desperate for someone to blame because blame is an effective way to discharge pain and it gives us a sense of counterfeit control.”

It was the most relatable thing I read all week.

But then Brown adds, “The research shows that hope is a powerful antidote to despair.” And she goes on to question how, through all the emotions she’s having, she can stay committed to courage, kindness and caring for others, regardless of others’ choices. In the end, she suggests “micro-dosing hope” because “the smallest, next right thing is hard AF, but sometimes it’s all we’ve got.”

So as we navigate our days, lives and communities, keep your eyes up, friends. And remember that you’re not alone if you have thoughts of giving up.

But giving up is simply not an option. Now more than ever, the world needs healing, hope and connection, and that starts with each of us.

The work you do is so much bigger than work.